« Nick's Notes

Call Me Shakespeare

by Nick Vitrano

Today is “Poetry At Work Day” (among many other days).  For some reason, when I asked “Who would be the person around here to fully embrace Poetry At Work Day," both Murphy and Katie looked at me.  So, I was charged with the task of penning an original work, but not just any poem…a poem that contains the following themes:

  • Poetry At Work Day
  • C-sections (today is C-section Day)
  • Exotic dancers with C-sections (Katie’s request)
  • Pastrami sandwiches (today is Hot Pastrami Sandwich Day)
  • Snowstorm Braden
  • Dress Up Your Pet Day
  • Organize Your Home Day

Here’s what I came up with:

This morning I’ve been asked

To complete the simple task

Of highlighting “Poetry At Work Day.”


I guess in the office I’m “that” guy

Who makes folks roll their eyes -

No C-section required - he can’t get laid.


Though that birthing trauma

Only makes you a mama.

It’s the beautiful work of a hospital lancer.


So like a hot pastrami on rye,

Rock that pole with pride,

You C-section scar wearing dancer.


Yes, all children are a blessing,

So today get to dressing,

Even if your “baby” has four legs.


Who says we hate pets?

Snowstorm Braden…you bet,

But that’s just winter where we make our digs.


If you wanna complain,

Take a fast train,

Right outta town and straight to hell.


But just be sure

To organize your drawers,

Or your home might not sell.


So there ya go.

I’ll wrap up this poem,

So we can get back to the show.


Murphy cue up a tune

That’ll all make us all swoon,

Pitbull/Ke$ha - let’s drop it low.


Tease Image: By Ninad Katyare (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons